I accidentally bought another jacket!!

What is it when you shop that you can't resist?  OK come on women ...admit it. I know there are some things you just can't resist. I have a very frugal/thrifty/green friend who admits to washing and reusing plastic bags and she also saves plastic grocery bags, cuts in strips and proceeds to crochet a purse. What a woman!! But my very frugal friend also did admit just recently to being a shopaholic at times. She counted her socks at moving time and admittted to 54 pairs of socks. For someone who most of the tiime goes barefoot I would say she has a sock fettish.

Another good friend of mine accused me of being a jacket  junkie. So yesterday I set out to disprove her theory and decide to count my jackets. So now my question is... do sweat shirts count as a jacket? I Googled...what is a sweat shirt? Google's description of a sweat shirt is a garmet intended to cover the torso and arms. A jacket is clothing for the upper body. Since they both are intended to cover the upper body I probably should count them all together. My favorite color used to be black...so I have 4 black jackets. (my sister-in-law says black is not a color) I also love white (she also says white is not a color)
I have 3 white jackets. The new color this season is that lime green that I have went crazy for...3 lime green jackets. Navy is another color that goes with anything...2 navy's. Last year my favorite color yellow....I really, really, really like yellow. ..5 yellow. Everyone woman needs at least one red jacket to wear during the Christmas season...I only have 2 red ones. Pink...only 1.  Then I have 6 jacket/sweatshirts of different colors not mentioned here. So now I am re-thinking everything as I realize I probably am a jacket junkie...since I counted twenty-six...oh now I'm wondering if I should have included my coats. Probably not!!

I had a good laugh at my friend who collect's socks but likes to go bare-footed...and here I am with numerous jackets...and I am constantly hot these days. Go figure!!

A smile...

Hello my friend....your smile creeps from the words on the telephone screen and dangles

just for a moment on my fingers...catches breath and then snakes

up my hand tickling as it darts inside my sleeve...up my

shoulder...pauses to tickle my ear lobe and then

treks up to my eyebrow...then dives into

the brown pool of my eye...creating

lovely ripples that lights up all

that is inside and outside

one more smile please...

just for the other

eye!!

THREE GOOD THINGS...

NOTE TO SELF...remember that as we make plans..God is smiling.

He must be smiling an awful lot lately...because it seems lately nothing goes as I plan. I go on a diet and plan on loosing some weight, this morning I stepped on the scales and decided to give my scales away to some needy family. I plan an amazing dinner and guests cancel....next time I'm planning SOUP. I spray my weeds and it rains and washes the weed killer away. I really dislike change..and I'm perfectly willing to compromise but it seems God wants to have everything His own way. I was really hoping that by this time in my life I could just breathe a deep sigh and say, "Oh, so this is how life works! Now I understand! Now I can settle back and just enjoy it."  But surprise...Seems I catch on to one thing and get really good at it and then it's over, and all the expertise I gained is no longer needed.

I didn't plan to celebrate Mother's day without a mother...or to celebrate my husbands birthday with out him.  Note to self....do research to determine if it's wierd to even want to celebrate his birthday without him.

So feeling kinda down this morning....OK I guess what I'm really feeling is poor...poor..pitiful me!!
So I decided to come up witih three GOOD things to focus on instead of myself.

1. On Saturday night my son was out of town so I invited my daughter in law and grandkids (4) over for a slumber party. What a grand time we had eating spaghetti and garlic bread...lots and lots of garlic bread. (Oh maybe that's why I'm mad at my scales this morning)

2. Went for a wonderful hike in the country. Saw beautiful wild flowers and stopped to play with some new born puppies. Then home to a good book and a nap on my porch swing while listening to the water cascade over the rocks in my beautiful water grden.

3. Rembering pastor Ron's sermon on Sunday and the fact that God never changes!! What a great thing to remember in this life of constant changes.

BREATHE IN...BREATHE OUT...MOVE ON!!

These are words to one of my favorite songs and this has also been my mantra these past years. When my husband of 47 years was diagnosed with cancer...I would tell myself just breathe...we can do this. During his numerous bouts with chemo...just breathe...during his stem cell transplants.....
breathe in...breathe out..move on!!!  Move on and do what has to be done. When we received the terminal diagnosis...I would breathe in but would forget to breath out. So numerous times a day you would hear this big whoosh of air being expelled as my body remembered to breathe out.

But that is in the past. Or is it? The past is never the past because it is really never gone. The past caught me off guard this morning as I was digging in my dresser drawer and came up with his safe accident free belt buckle. The past is there when I look into the eyes of our youngest son...the past is always there and after all where would it go and why would I want it to be gone anyway. The past I'm talking about and the past that I want to be gone is the hurting past of the past few months of his life. I'm trying to "move on" and move away from the bad years and focus on the good times. Trying so hard to not let the painful past haunt me and trying so hard to not let the past become my future. I want to look at the belt buckle and remember how much he loved driving his big 18 wheeler...I want to look at pictures of him on his ATV at the dunes and remember his dare-devil rides and jumps. What a hoot!!  I want to view pictures of us on vacation and remember the fun we had together...no tears of sadness. I don't want to remember cancer...chemo...treatments...and final days. I want to move on and move away from the pain...move on and away from cancer.

Breathe in...breathe out....move on!!