BIRTHDAY.....AGAIN????

Guess what......in a couple of weeks I will be 1,096 days short of being seven decades old. WOW!!
As I sit here writing this I am at an over 55 hot mineral water resort in Southern California and most everyone is way over 55. My daughter and neice in their 40's came to visit for a week and they loved being "the young hot babes" at the pool. One of my husband's favorite sayings's was "getting old is not for sissy's." and I have to admit he was right. I have noticed while living amoung "old" people...ooops..excuse me....senior adults.... this past couple of months is that most of the time the conversation's in the pool reside around their past surgery's...their achy joints....bad knees....bad backs...medications...and or numerous other ailments.

I don't mind being old but I sure hate looking old....and I sure wish I could have had some practice before hand. But it seems I just woke up one morning and realized....I am old. It just sorta snuck up on me. One day I was the "hot babe at the pool" and the next I'm buying slimmers disquised as a cami. It's called a flex-eez and incidently the name is a complete oxi-moron... there is nothing at all that you can flex..let alone flex with ease, while wearing this cami.  It is made of some miracle spandex so strong that I have to remember to breathe. Note to self...OK now it's time to breathe in then wait a couple seconds then... breathe out.

Oh there were signs along the way that I was getting older but I guess I just ignored them. Like random hair growth. I had my upper lip and chin waxed for the very first time a couple of month's ago. OUCH...then she had the nerve to ask if I wanted a bikini wax also. A bikini wax...after feeling the pain of the upper lip wax....who in their right mind would say yes to that question. But that poses another question: what would make her think that I would need... or want...or enjoy...a bikini wax? ..and no I did not tell her about my random hair growth in the vicinity of the girls.

Another sign along the way that I must have just ignored is my neck...I think I have turkey genes that are runnning rampent in my family. If this keeps up I can actually see myself being afraid to go outdoors on Thanksgiving. My neck tissue seems to have developed a life of it's own. Young girls take care of your neck. I know....wrap it in one of those FLEX-EEZ every night before bed.

I used to have an amazing memory Tell me your phone number once and could remember it and dial it a week later. Now I have problems not only with my memory...but my hearing as well. When driving to the store I have to make three left turns...why don't I just turn my signal on when I leave home and then I won't have to remember to turn it on..then off again.  Seems so much easier to me.

My greatest fear is driving the wrong way. Just lately I went east on the freeway for 40 miles before realizing I needed to go west. Easy mistake for even young people to make....isn't it?  I have gone down a one-way street the wrong way....I tend to get out of elevators as soon as the door opens...note to self: check to see what floor your on.  I tend not to believe my GPS lady....she enjoys sending me the wrong direction. As if I know more than the satelites that the military rely on for national security issues. My greatest fear lately is heading through the car wash going the wrong direction. Now that would be funny....especially if I meet another directionally impaired senior adult lady that immediately assumes she's going the wrong way and starts backing up. Now that's funny...I don't care who you are!!